Showing posts with label basketball. Show all posts
Showing posts with label basketball. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

We Were Classless When Classless Wasn't Cool

USU-byu basketball game tonight. It was "Adventures in Hardcore Fandom" to the extreme.

First, you have to get in line, which some enterprising individuals started YESTERDAY at 4:30 pm - set up a tent and everything! By 3:00 this afternoon, my roommate called to tell me that the line was around the Spectrum and all the way to the HPER building, so I might want to think about going to stand in line. Also, I was planning on going with some friends who both worked until later, so it would behoove me to go save a place for us.

So, I went. It wasn't too bad - then the sun went down. Holy. Crap. Can you say "Frostbite?" Some people standing next to me in line started playing "Ninja Destruction," a game that should have more movement than it does to keep you warm, but I was still freezing. I texted one of the friends coming with me, asking her to bring a blanket. She texted me back saying she didn't have one, but would I like hot chocolate? She brought the goods - and it was HOT. But I chugged it down like it was Gatorade. It warmed me up for a little while.

THEN - it was finally time to go into the Spectrum. We were dang lucky - I swear they shut the doors right after we swiped our student ID cards. Now a new problem: finding seats. I think some people snuck in without checking their cards, so there were NO SEATS in the student section -_-' We tried to commandeer some season ticket holders' seat - until they showed up :( Then we tried to stand in the aisle without getting caught. But some "nice" people pointed out two empty seats next to them and we took them before security could come clean us out of the aisles (I'll explain why "nice" is in quotations in a moment).

Oh - I made signs for this game. But we were so far up - we were behind the giant American flag in the corner, so if I held up my signs, no one would be able to see them. I compensated by holding them lower - but then the teeny-bopper freshmen behind me (who wouldn't know a basketball from a... never mind...) kept whining that they couldn't see and the "nice" guy next to me kept glaring. But, there were a couple of short Mexican kids in front of me who no savvy loco Americanos and they sat down frequently so I could display my signs without angering the locals.

And this is the best part - a few rows down, another kid had a sign that he kept holding up (it wasn't blocking anything). The "nice" guy next to me yelled for him to put it down, but he didn't hear him (try hearing anything more than six inches away when the Spectrum is in full basketball mode). "Nice" Guy procures an empty water bottle and chucks it at Sign Boy, beaning him on the head. Sign Boy looks around for the culprit - I discreetly jab my thumb in the direction of "nice" guy - Sign Boy sees it and flips "Nice" Guy" off. I felt vindicated. If I couldn't directly annoy byu fans, at least I got the jerk next to me flipped off.

Oh yeah, the game: I will say this - I'm thankful my boys shot poorly in the first half and not in the second half. Every time they let the long bomb go, I wanted to crawl in a hole. I had flashbacks of last Saturday, it was so bad. But we pulled it out and I am happy. The last USU game I attended before I graduated two years ago, we played Idaho and we lost. That was not a happy thing. I'm glad that they won this game, which is the actual last game I got to see as a USU student. The fact that it was byu is icing on the cake.

Even though I didn't get people to see my signs - people in line liked them. Other sign-makers weren't as creative. One doof just wrote "byu isn't very good." I don't want to disparage my fellow Aggies, but what kind of creativity does that take? Another sign said "Cats lick themselves" (WTF?) and one just said "byu swallows." I simply can't believe it - I had at least ten clever ideas and that's the kind of crap you come up with? I think you need to be behind the flag in the nosebleeds.

Though the best one that wasn't mine (face it, mine were pretty good) was "Coach Rose still owes me gas money from last year." There were plenty referencing max hall's idiocy (we even got to chant "Classless" at the few byu dorks that made the trip. I was shocked that they were even there - I thought they could only find Vegas).

All in all - a happy day. Revenge is a dish best served cold (cold here meaning sub-zero temperatures - my thumbs still haven't recovered).

(What kind of name is "Jimmer?" Seriously - what were your parents smoking?)

Pictures!!

First, my signs:






























(This one was a favorite ^_^)


































Game Day shirt - the back just says "Beat the Cougars." Lame... Last year's were better. (Ignore my five chins)
















Lining up outside the Spectrum at 4:00 pm. Some of those people waaaaay in the front had been there since yesterday.















More people lined up.















The Winning Team!!















The Losing Team (and their loser fans behind them)

It's a Rivalry Thing. You Wouldn't Understand

It's Game Day - Utah State vs. byu. Oh boy, there is sooo much good material for this. And I'm a little loopy because of the magic marker smell. Yes folks, I made POSTERS for the game tonight!! I don't know if the game is televised, but I'll wave when I hold up my signs. Of course, pictures are a given and will be forthcoming (with game day shirt and everything. Actually, I thought last year's shirts were funnier, but I can't do anything about that. Maybe if they have one at DI...)

Some jokes that didn't make the cut, but should have:

- Beat byu so max hall can hate us too (if I have to explain this, you haven't been paying attention the last few days)

- Glad you could find your way here. Sorry it wasn't Vegas (referencing the fact that the Zoo had to play a "road game" against USU at the EnergySolutions Arena in Salt Lake last year because they couldn't handle coming all the way up to Logan - yet the football team can make it to the Vegas bowl every year)

- Win or lose, you still have to live in Provo (this was on the game day shirts last year, so the novelty has probably worn off)

Oh - for people preaching "tolerance" and "love" and "can't we all just get along and hug each other?", I have one thing to say: It's a rivalry thing. You wouldn't understand. Let us have this one time of the year where all our hate and animosity comes out against our arch-rivals and we'll leave you alone the other 50 weeks in the year. Fair enough.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

World Class Cat-Herding

It's just my luck. You know, I've cheered for the Utah Jazz and the Utah Utes (football and basketball) all my life. I've seen these teams have success, but never win any championships. They've come close, but never got there, much to my disappointment and many tears (ask me about a Jazz Finals game I went to when I was 13. Heartbreaking...)

So, in order to be more "diverse" Davey Checketts brings Euro-trash - I mean, soccer - to Salt Lake. And wouldn't you know it, they would win their retarded championship. The one pro team in Utah I hate - and they win their championship (after having a losing season, it seems). There is no justice in this world. This idiotic Real Salt Lake team has only been around for - what - five years? The only people who will be celebrating are all the illegal Mexicans. What about us white folk that have been holding out for one of our American teams to bring home a title? This is SO not fair!!

How the crap do you win by tying? What kind of stupid game is this? What kind of stupid name is Real Salt Lake? Can't you at least have a real team name? This isn't Spain - this is the Wasatch Front. We speak English. We're not trying to impress people here. If you want to be accepted in this country, have a name like - Tigers or Bulldogs (or Aggies or Utes). We're not France or England or any other stupid country in Europe. And we're sure as heck not Mexico (contrary to what some people might think).

I hate soccer (or as I like to call it, Cat-Herding). Because it's popular in Europe and the "world" likes it and they tell Americans that we have to like it, I hate it. I could be more tolerant of it if they weren't so snotty about it.

I will say this: at least they don't have "Utah" in their name. I don't have to cheer for them. I don't live in Salt Lake. They have no claim on me and I have no claim on them. Just like I don't live in Provo, so I don't cheer for BYU (there are other reasons, but that's the relevant one right now). If it was Real Utah - I'd move to Nevada.

Now the Jazz need to win the Finals. It's only fair. They've been in town longer and they've been denied for more years. More importantly - I've been denied for longer than soccer's been around. Cough up, NBA, NCAA.

(Barring that, Davey Checketts can fork out some money and give Utah an NFL team. If the Rams still stink it up in St. Louis - they can move to Salt Lake. They wouldn't even have to change their initials. Checketts owes us for this humiliation).