Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Chinese to the Left of Me, Russians to the Right

Review/Recap of 24: Live Another Day, Episode 10: 8:00 pm-9:00 pm - SPOILERS

*Supposedly, they were going to insert time-jumps between episodes so that this 12-episode mini-series would take place over the course of 24 hours. So far... nothin'. Not complaining or anything - just making an observation. Granted, there are still two episodes left, so anything could happen (might even be a "Epilogue - Where Are They Now?" sort of thing that jump twelve hours ahead to Kate becoming head of station, Mark becoming the Russians' new punching bag, and Jack and Audrey on their way to a nice Mediterranean honeymoon).

The Problem of Steve Navarro was handled quite aptly - from Jack chasing him down and having him arrested (still happy-dancing over here that Jack is still in charge!), then Jack realizing Narvarro gave the No Good Very Bad Device to Adrian Cross, then Kate learning that Navarro framed her husband for treason which lead to Hubby's death - THEN Kate going apeshit on Navarro's ass (FINALLY!) and getting the whereabouts of the NGVB Device because of said apeshit-ness (the look on Navarro's face when he realizes Kate and Jack are working together to get information out of him without giving him immunity was priceless).

Have I mentioned lately how much I adore Kate Morgan?

(Side Note: Whenever the head of a government agency tells his people that something is Number One Priority, what he's really saying is "I hope you've all had your dinner break already, 'cause you ain't goin' nowhere for a while.")

Then Chloe - after being emotionally manipulated by that Certified Piece of Shit Adrian Cross (you don't invoke the names of Morris and Prescott O'Brian, you rat bastard!), has the Attack of Conscience that we knew our dear Chloe would have - and tries to steal back the NGVB Device. And probably would have succeeded had Jack Bauer been driving that garbage truck (as great as Jack is, he can't be everywhere at once. Dammit).

Dear Chloe -

And then... we have Mark Boudreau. Who displays jealously as adroitly as a fourteen-year-old girl who found out her boyfriend's been macking on the head cheerleader under the bleachers. Except Audrey's hasn't been macking on anybody - least of all Jack (dammit). Audrey even tries to make amends with Mark after that whole "President Dad Was Willing to Sacrifice Himself and Had Mark Help Him Do It." So - Mark's actions with the Russians in helping them get Jack (WHILE JACK IS IN THE MIDDLE OF SAVING YOUR GOVERNMENT'S ASS, YOU FREAKING IDIOT!!) - yeah, I have zero forgiveness in my heart for this.

(Keep in mind that, clear back in Episode 3 [at least, I think it was Episode 3], Mark was all "Oh, we can't let Audrey know that Jack Bauer exists, let alone that he's in the same city! And then Mark was the one that mentioned it one episode later! So, yeah - Mark Boudreau, already not the smartest guy in the room).

Ugh - no more Mark. Go away already.

After Chloe's heroic-yet-failed attempt to get the NGVB Device back to the People in Charge, she and Adrian find their new secret hideaway, expecting to have a joyous family reunion. Except a bunch of Chinese dudes came in and shot the place to hell. And not just any Chinese dudes. These are the same Chinese dudes that captured Jack at the end of Season 5 and sent Audrey to the Land of Catatonia in Season 6. The Chinese are much better at emotional manipulation, it seems, since all they have to do it kneecap Adrian and Chloe's willing to help them. To be fair - she was trying to stall for time in the way that only Chloe can. Which involves snarking at a bunch of Chinese mobsters who have guns pointed at her head.

After learning that Navarro did his Civic Duty and put a tracker on the NGVB Device (what, does he want a fruit basket as a thank you?), Jack and Kate take off to find the stupid thing - only to get T-boned by Mark's New Russian Friends. So, instead of storming in and apprehending the Chinese, Jack and Kate are instead involved in a shootout with the Russians (GEE, THANKS A LOT MARK!) Meanwhile, the Chinese get the NGVB Device working (seeing past Chloe's obstruction, which would have otherwise worked had Jack not gotten sidetracked), and send "orders" to a US Naval submarine to sink a Chinese warship. Which makes no sense (then again, have you ever seen English-to-Chinese-and-back-to-English bootleg subtitles? Purely for your entertainment: Example 1, Example 2)

So... yep... thanks to Mark Boudreau, the US is now in a war with China. On the bright side, at least it's not a land war. 'Cause those never end well.

Two hours left, folks.

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