Tuesday, May 3, 2016

I'm Out.

Review/Recap of Once Upon a Time Episode 5.20 - "Firebird" SPOILERS! (sorta...)
Imma pretend this is where things left off. Better than the alternative.



Do not want.



Rumbelle gets a baby and Captain Swan gets THIS?

Once Upon a Time - I freaking hate you right now.

I don't even care what happens in the next episode.

Well... maybe I do. A little.

There had BETTER be some last-minute, eleventh-hour heroics, or this will be THE LAST season I watch. I don't care if you resort to Deus ex Machina at this point. JUST FIX THIS.


Let me draw up some perspective for you: My family's dog died on Sunday. The current political season is seven kinds of shitstorm-and-three-quarters. Beloved celebrities are dying like fruit flies. DC just took a huge dump on the character of Superman and called it a movie. I'm more and more convinced that Sweet Meteor of Death would be the best choice for president in November. And you're going to totally nuke the best romantic couple you have on this freaking show??

I'm sorry. Did Once Upon a Time and Castle switch writing teams? What do you think this is?

You all are lucky there are still three episodes left of this season. You have time. Get your crap together.

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