I really should have been doing videos with these posts the whole time. But this week's was just too easy. Well, I tried first to find the Back to the Future "My Name is Darth Vader from the Planet Vulcan," but everyone on YouTube had to edit it themselves and inserted every bad song from Lady Gaga to Rick Astley into the scene. Honestly, why mess with the original Van Halen version?
Even though it is my birthday (and thanks to everyone who extended well-wishes and a BIG THANK YOU to Cecily
Stolen Ford Explorer with a banana delivery - Free (to you)
Teargas - How the heck should I know how?
Seeing the stunned look on Charles Logan's face when he realizes all his security and blackmail hasn't done a thing for him - Priceless
There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's BauerCard. Accepted everywhere there's a presidential conspiracy cover-up.
Now, I've never been to New York, but I don't think banana delivery people are stupid enough to leave the car running AND the back cargo hatch open. Then again, this is Jack Bauer's luck we're talking about.
I would feel sorry for President Taylor with her headache - except I know how she got it and I really don't feel any pity for her right now. The "24" writers have simply taken Grandma's warning that you have cover up one small lie with an even bigger lie and pretty soon your lies are out of control and made it one of the best endings to a series ever concocted.
I wish I had PhotoShop/artistical skills because I want to see Logan as the devil and Ethan as an angel sitting on President Taylor's shoulders. Or maybe even Logan as the serpent in the Garden of Eden because he certainly acts the part.
Speaking of Eden, she was getting a little pissy after they found Jack's latest Thanksgiving turkey practice victim. And a BIG HAND to Chloe for finally proving that Logan's lackeys in CTU have zero actual power and aren't going to be getting any anytime soon. HELL YES you're still provisional director, honey bunch!
I know I've been critical of this season to this point - but all that idiocy was well worth it to see the Wilderness Youth Counselor pee himself when he saw Darth-Vader!Jack coming after him and his Secret Service detail couldn't do a damn thing about it.
And after all his poker-chess-Monopoly-Candy-Land games, he still gives everything up to the first guy with a pair that comes after him with a handgun and teargas. Though, Logan deserves a Grammy for those singing-like-a-canary-bird stylings. Maybe Justin Bieber can get him a record deal.
Although, that Russian driver-guy that Jack assaulted in the parking garage sang pretty sweet too. Maybe he and Logan can team up for Best Stool Pigeon of the Year (and the Russian can knife the judges from behind).
As an aside, when Jack realized that he'd been stabbed, his "blood looked suspiciously like red paint. I'm just sayin'...
As an another aside - JACK TOOK OUT A SLEW OF BAD GUYS AND I MISSED IT???? (there's something up with that - you do NOT cut to political gamesmanship and moral dilemmas when Jack is shooting (and, it turns out, stabbing) crap. You just don't!!!)
Next week's preview - The Final Hours!! (Dun, dun DUNNNN!!) Number one - where is Tony? (sorry , the fangirl in me must ask these questions). Number two - There was one shot that looked like President Taylor, but it was really Chloe (HUH??) Number three - What is with Jack's creepy little smirk when he's about to pull the trigger? I didn't think Renee's death would have hit him this bad. Oy... (bear in mind, there will be a movie. They cannot kill Jack, no matter how mortally wounded he is).
And I know everyone's wondering, but I'm just going to go ahead and say it - Did Meredith ever pay for her coffee?
(Apologies to Ron White and Blue Collar Comedy for the bladder-control jokes)
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